(Continued) Part 3
This is a continuation of My Experience with Paid Companionship
In between the moments of luxury and after being consumed by the life of fancy, I knew at the end of the day we both wore masks and we both built an illusion despite our characters coming off authentic. I never thought about the end too suddenly or harshly though, until I noticed it was becoming my reality. The morning of our last day he only came to me for a quick fuck, and he wouldn’t speak to me like he used to. I heard the coffee maker go while I was getting dressed to the perfection he expected, and told myself if it did not get better, this was going to be our last hoorah. I walked out, gave him a quick kiss, and turned swiftly before allowing the disdain show on my face before him. The most emotionally painful thing of all, was the fake smile I had to plaster on my face as he plopped down on the couch next to me.
“..The autumn leaf fell in front of the window; he brewed coffee to the perfect depth of flavor and richness, and I sipped hastily as my mind wandered…”
I watched the seasons change trying to ignore the disillusioned feeling as he left for work. Even if I brought up my concerns, the feeling grew to the point it was too late for any apologies. As the day carried on, and as expected, we didn’t do our normal gambling things or fine dinners. I was angry; I had grown to trust him, and he took advantage of it. I had nothing to show for our time as he did not pay me up-front like in the past. I decided to at least tease my annoyance towards him, and his demeanor of lying was nothing to forget. All the time I had dedicated to him was lost forever. After a shitty movie, we arrived back at his 40th floor loft. I sat in the bathroom that evening for what felt like an eternity; I never imagined our epic life would end with me arguing my paycheck. However, the anger I felt started to turn into a sorrowful sigh of relief. “Perhaps he was riding of something he saw as a burden.” I thought. I stayed in the bathroom until I was sure and awkwardly crawled in next to him. He slept, however I couldn’t get a minute in. By the time he saw me off the next morning, I felt queasy. He only gave me $60 dollars cash and some spoken words of something less than appreciative.
“I saw the camera flash dim from my life, the casino noise disappeared, and the Italian food left a bad taste in my mouth.”
You would have thought this was going to destroy me; however, I grew up the moment we said hello. Not that it was his sole responsibility (I appreciated the acceleration) it was everything I knew and noticed within the world. From strangers, situations, and my parents’ stories created the perfect combo to hold my own. And with him in particular, I stepped miles ahead from all other grown women. Rich Guy Here let the details slip many years of hello’s later on why we ended so poorly, and everything made sense. I didn’t invite the closure, but a nice resolution hurt no one and any malice that was left vanished. I was extremely grateful for all I have learned, lost, and what I was able to build for myself. I simply wished him the best. Progressing forward, I’ll always cherish the memories of our time together and I’ll never forget the sound of me padding across the Florence Street cement. “You can change your outcome simply by changing your mindset.” To be successful at anything, you need the confidence, self-sufficiency, and the determination for change. And being able to let go and move forward is the greatest skill of all. Once I woke up, I reached out and took what I knew to be possible, and I will never regret doing so. I grew in ways I wanted to all along and experienced more than enough for anyone my age. After tasting the lifestyle I desperately wanted to maintain, Rich Guy Here didn’t hinder my confidence that I could get it again.
